What NOT to do when going down town...

So I went out last night to celebrate a friends birthday. Everything was fine and dandy on our part, but the disgraces we saw while out were almost unbearable.

#1: Don't be out, in your late 20's (or any age for that matter) looking like a dirty prostitute posing as a cougar. You are not hot, nobody wants to see your nasty hooker outfit, and you are wayyy too old to be out with your grandma friends trying to look cute.  Here is a PERFECT example:

#2: I don't care WHAT you look like, but especially if your out wearing a shirt that makes you look like effing Steve from Blue's Clues, do NOT be eating each others faces in public. Save your STD's for the bedroom. That is all. Thank you.

And #3: Don't be a douche in public and force the cops to take you away. Drinking and having fun is one thing, but acting a straight fool is just asking for it. So when you're in public, have some type of self control. Nobody needs the cops showing up, and nobody needs to be so drunk that they can't function. And if that is the case, get some better friends who will at least take care of you. Amen.

And if you do decide that any of these offences are for some reason something you want to try, you need to take you, your Ed Hardy T-shirt, & your nasty looks and go somewhere else.